Words from a Father

Husband of One, Father of Four

Tag: honesty

499. Good Side

There are a few people you just don’t mess with: your doctor, the person making your food, your mechanic, and those handling your paycheck. Stay on their good side.

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484. Comfortable Distance

Impropriety can masquerade in friendly clothes. Be friendly to your spouse’s friends, but keep a safe, appropriate distance, and always tell your spouse of any advances by another. It may feel awkward for a moment, but it is never something to hide. Your loyalty is always first to your spouse.

466. Without Reservation

Love and serve your spouse without reservation. Anything less will be sensed and resented.

457. Explain Pro-choice

A difficult moment for a pro-choice advocate comes when they try to explain to an eight year old exactly what it is they are supporting.

439. Instrumental Value

There are few things worth what you pay for them. Instruments are one of those things, partially for how long they will last and partially for how well they can communicate from your soul.

410. Careful Gains

Better to gain rightful enemies than wrongful loyalties.

369. Unique Love

Many parents try to say they love their children the same, that no child is loved more than another. But this sounds odd when put in another context, like food, films, or other friends. We don’t love those exactly the same, we love them for what they are.

We do not love you the same, we love you each uniquely — just as you are, for who you are, and completely.

301. Experiment

Turn your children’s bad choices into science experiments explaining cause and effect and the responsibility of their choices.

Two nights ago, eldest daughter, you decided to take a plastic bag of melted ice into your room that previously was used to soothe your bumped head. You played with it on your sister’s bed and then squeezed it until it broke.

After drying her bed we spent almost an hour filling plastic sandwich bags with water, dreaming up ways to burst them, theorizing what would happen, and carrying it out.

Beyond having fun splashing each other in the sink, we learned that the walls of the plastic sandwich bag are weaker than the seal, and usually in the same region — about a half inch below the seal. And a bad choice was turned into a learning opportunity.

This night was brought to you by the words force, pressure, and the number of bags we broke: five.

284. Tolerance and Intolerance

Intolerance is the unwillingness to allow variant perspectives, opinions, beliefs, or choices to be discussed; it’s the outright denial of their validity, leaving no room for dialogue.

Tolerance means you understand a perspective, but it does not necessitate celebrating or encouraging that perspective. Tolerance employs a cordiality toward the other person even while disagreeing.

262. Judge

Judge yourself more harshly than you judge others.

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