The media rewards crazy. Real life hates it.
When someone hurts you, forgiveness is the only way forward. Not primarily for them, but for yourself.
The depth of the hurt correlates to the level of value given to the relationship and the amount of expectation the individuals have. The closer the relationship and higher the expectation, the deeper the hurt. This makes restoring the relationship that much more meaningful and necessary, and therefore difficult.
Any repentance and forgiveness that was quick, easy, or painless shows the shallow level of relationship and its low expectations. A repentance and forgiveness worthy of the relationship is costly and not easy at all, but it is worth it.
Don’t confuse the desire for a repaired relationship with the amount of time it takes to bring it about. The two are related, but not dependent. It may seem to happen quickly in some circumstances and slowly in others, without regard for the desire. I have a feeling that it takes longer than we initially realize; we can see it clearer when we look back upon the process. The important thing is to keep moving forward as much as it is up to you.
I’ve written a bit more about conceptual thoughts on forgiveness in this prior essay:
“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”
—Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
“Vice does not lose its character by becoming fashionable.”
What’s been seen can’t be unseen. What’s been done can’t be undone. They are only accompanied by shame, doubt, guilt, regret, and the like.
In this, restraint is the highest liberation you can know.
It is hypocritical for an anti-theist to rage about God commanding slaughter at a few defined instances in the Bible, yet they do not rage against the perpetual daily slaughter of innocent children by abortion.
Some consequences are so delayed or unanticipated, by the time they take effect there is no way to correct your choice. One of the worst things in this situation is the amount of loss suffered before the consequences even begin.