Words from a Father

Husband of One, Father of Four

Tag: children

436. Full Life

The way to a full life is to spend it on the memorable and the eternal.

435. Kids’ Treasure

Treasure the now. Your kids sure do.

433. Change

Give kids your change.

426. The Legacy of Overcoming

We are not wounded by the victories of character in our parents, but by how their character has failed.

That means, then, that a large portion of parenting is being able to overcome your own vices in such a way that you pass on your victories to your children rather than your failures.

425. Baby Sleep

Sleep when the baby sleeps. It won’t last longer than two hours.

424. Newborn Worries

Don’t worry. You’re going to be a great parent. Better than us probably.

423. Food for Newborns

Never give honey to a newborn baby. And don’t give cabbage or broccoli to a new mother.

408. Essay: One Shot

I only have one shot at raising you kids, only one chance to parent you. This time right now is never replayed — we can’t record it, rewind it, download it, or check out the source code of this time with you, and then change it in either my memory or yours. One shot and then it’s done.

I will father you for a little while and then you’ll go through a long transition where you begin to take real ownership of your decisions, become your own person, forge your own identity. That is when our relationship will change . . . you will decide to continue to be fathered by me or not. A lot of that will depend on how I have done until that point. It will depend on how I have stewarded our relationship thus far.

This transition will bring a new aspect into the parent–child relationship: friendship. You will move from being “just the kid” to being so much more. It will be friendship based on history and trust and lots more things I don’t understand. It’ll be a brand new era. But the decision you will someday make starts with the hour-by-hour interactions we have now, with the way I make you feel when you’re around me and how you feel when we’re apart.

I only get one shot at it. So my philosophy is that, at any given point, I want you to feel love. Whether I’m feeding you, teaching you something new, disciplining you, playing hide and seek with you, dancing, singing, talking, or running around the house with you, I want you to feel love.

I only get one shot, so I’ll take my chances with love.

405. Quotes: Ravi Zacharias on Meaning

“. . . For a child[,] meaning is procured by his recognition of the awe-inspiring reality that surrounds his life. That reality is fused with wonder and design, engendering purpose.”

—Ravi Zacharias, Can Man Live Without God

369. Unique Love

Many parents try to say they love their children the same, that no child is loved more than another. But this sounds odd when put in another context, like food, films, or other friends. We don’t love those exactly the same, we love them for what they are.

We do not love you the same, we love you each uniquely — just as you are, for who you are, and completely.

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