We’re your parents and we’ll fight for you, but your siblings will be your closest and most faithful comrades throughout life if you let them. Nurture trust in that relationship and encourage each other often. Go to bat for each other. The investment is well worth the return for a forever friend.
You can’t get to know each other in a dark theater.
Impropriety can masquerade in friendly clothes. Be friendly to your spouse’s friends, but keep a safe, appropriate distance, and always tell your spouse of any advances by another. It may feel awkward for a moment, but it is never something to hide. Your loyalty is always first to your spouse.
Daughter, get as much education as you can. If anything ever happens to your husband, life will be up to you. Education is not your way out, it is your way forward.
Son, get as much education as you can. It is your job to provide the most security possible for your family. It is also your responsibility to encourage your wife to continue her education in case anything happens to you.
No excuses: Take care of her as well as you can while you are here; make sure she can take care of herself if you are gone.
This is modern-day chivalry. This is one way to honor your family.
When someone hurts you, forgiveness is the only way forward. Not primarily for them, but for yourself.
The depth of the hurt correlates to the level of value given to the relationship and the amount of expectation the individuals have. The closer the relationship and higher the expectation, the deeper the hurt. This makes restoring the relationship that much more meaningful and necessary, and therefore difficult.
Any repentance and forgiveness that was quick, easy, or painless shows the shallow level of relationship and its low expectations. A repentance and forgiveness worthy of the relationship is costly and not easy at all, but it is worth it.
Don’t confuse the desire for a repaired relationship with the amount of time it takes to bring it about. The two are related, but not dependent. It may seem to happen quickly in some circumstances and slowly in others, without regard for the desire. I have a feeling that it takes longer than we initially realize; we can see it clearer when we look back upon the process. The important thing is to keep moving forward as much as it is up to you.
I’ve written a bit more about conceptual thoughts on forgiveness in this prior essay:
http://jfjudah.wordpress.com/2011/04/19/362-axiomatic-things/
If you join the military — and I don’t think you necessarily should — follow a few guidelines:
Yeah, do your best at everything. Don’t be afraid to fail; do your best at everything. You’ll do great.
“If you want to build a ship, don’t drum up people to collect wood and don’t assign them tasks and work, but rather teach them to long for the endless immensity of the sea.”
—Antoine de Saint-Exupéry
Have kids? Get a table without any planks or channels, otherwise every piece of runaway food will get stuck there and every spilled drink will flow through the cracks.
“Vice does not lose its character by becoming fashionable.”
—John Wesley
You are not a good parent based on how many gifts you give your children. You are a good parent based on how you take your responsibilities toward them: how you steward their heart; how you relate your love and enjoyment of them to them individually; how you instill stronger values in them than what you observe in your culture; how you invite them into greatness; how you encourage their giftings; and how you challenge them toward greater maturity.
